Thursday, December 14, 2006

Overprotective Frustrations

In November I went to Puerto Peñasco a.k.a. Rocky Point. Since then I have been turning over and over in my head just how I wanted to share the experience with you. There were so many things that happened and some that were hard to handle that I am still not sure if I can truly relate how I feel about it.

Since I started working with Amor Ministries, I have found that more and more I am increasingly becoming attached to the groups I work with. You see, God has placed a burden on my heart to care for my groups. Not only to care for them but to take care of them, to provide all that I can to help them make their trip successful. Admittedly there are times that I fail to live up to that calling, and other times things arise that are just out of my control. Puerto Peñasco provided plenty of circumstances that I had no control over. It left me feeling helpless.

I remember when my daughter was born the doctor used some sort of suction cup on her head to assist in removing her from her mother. I watched in horror as it deformed her head to the shape of the cup. I really wanted to hit the doctor for doing that to my baby, but I knew he had done this many times before and logic told me it was going to be alright. Even so, I could not help the overprotective feeling that was raging inside, yet my not being a doctor left me in a position to do nothing. Puerto Peñasco brought that same feeling about my groups because there was nothing I could do but pray.

One of the joys I bring away from going to Puerto Peñasco is the fact that I get to work with Central Christian Church my home church in Mesa, AZ. This year I also worked with St. Simon and Jude and American Evangelical Lutheran. I enjoy the fellowship with each of these groups and hope to see them return.

Unfortunately each of these groups had and accident on their trip. St. Simon and Jude’s accident turned out to be a minor cut from a board falling on the head of one of their students and they were able to return to the project. But Central and American Lutheran’s were major accidents.

Central had a man fall from the roof resulting in serious head and back injuries. Last I heard he was still in the hospital starting rehabilitation. American Lutheran had a major traffic accident with a dump truck on their way out of camp as they headed for home. It appeared that no one had major injuries but one man was taken to the United States to be checked for a concussion. I still have heard nothing further about him.

Needless to say it was a long hard trip, when I turned to God, I felt like I was watching that doctor again wondering what the heck he was doing, but knowing he knows best. I painfully praised God because I know he works all thing together for the good of those who love Him. I certainly love Him, and I am sure these groups love Him also. So, my only conclusion is that it has to work for good somewhere down the road.

When I finally returned home I let myself grieve over the pain my groups felt and the pain of helplessness that I felt. I sat in my truck listening to the words of this song and finally broke down and wept;

No Doubt by Petra
There are times when you feel like you can't go on
There are times when you feel like giving in
And there are times when you feel like you can't try anymore
There are times of trouble in believing
This test of your faith will last
As long as it takes to pass
Till you have no more doubt you'll endure
And your faith will emerge true and pure

There's a time to take a reckless leap of faith
There's a time to be cautious and to wait
And there's a way of learning from the past
That this time of trouble won't last
And sometimes we want to think we know
The ways He will choose to make us grow
But it's never the way of our choosing
And we can't always see what He's using

There will be winters in the seasons of our soul
With a cold and bitter wind that chills our lives
But our faith can be building a fire
That will warm us till springtime arrives

No doubt it'll be alright
With God it'll work together for good
No doubt in the end it will be understood
No doubt it'll all work out
With faith He can move any mountain for us
No doubt in the power of Jesus
And after all is done we find out
All we really need to have is no doubt

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