I never realized that there would be times as a servant of God that I would become weary. Times that I would doubt Gods power or even his existence. But I have found it to be true. There are times when I grow weary and wonder if I will have the strength to finish this race. There are times that I wonder if I should stumble again will I have the strength to get back up and move steadily toward the goal. There are times that I wonder if I will make it to the awaiting arms of my heavenly father.
Those times are daunting. They drain the energy form me. Unfortunately these are times that I have stopped relying on Gods strength to sustain me and tried to hold myself up by my own strength. Over the last couple of months this is what I have been going through. This is not how God made me. He made me weak so that through Him I could be made strong. He made me to be dependent on him.
Fortunately God’s grace has a way of renewing me and bringing me back into His strength and support. He always sheds His light on my path and shows me the way home. He reminds me who he is. About a week ago I got a reminder.
A group from my home church in Mesa, AZ came out to build a home and to encourage Jackie, the kids and me. It was wonderful to have them here and to work so closely with them.
While they were here we attended a church service in Juarez. And it was so apparent that God had planned the day. When we arrived at the church they that asked if any of us would like to speak, and two of us got up and gave testimonies of how God had changed our lives and showed us the love of Jesus. It was an emotional time for me. My heart was starting to soften and I could see that I was the one causing my doubts and struggles. And that is just were God wanted me for the remainder of the service. You see they had a guest speaker that day and he gave his testimony, and it was a powerful reminder of Gods ability to work miracles in the hearts of men. I don’t think my eyes were dry at any time during the rest of the service.
“Six years ago my appearance was very different” he began, and went on to tell that six years prior he dressed like a woman. He had the body of a woman. He had breast of a woman. He filled his body with female hormones. And for twenty years he lived the life of a homosexual transvestite. People in the communities would see going with men and called him crazy.
But one woman looked past his appearance and saw his heart. She told him of Jesus’ love for him and that he had to change. He told her that he was happy the way he was and she should leave him alone. But she wouldn’t, she told him he could not be happy the way he was living because that is not how God made him. She told him how he felt in his heart and he wondered how she could know exactly how he felt. God used her to bring him to faith in God.
Jesus can do all things. People told him no women would want him, but God gave him a wife. The doctors told him that you are born a homosexual and you cannot change, but God changed his desires. The doctors told him the hormones had ruin any chance of him having children, but God gave him two kids.
With tears running down my face I remembered Gods power. I love this king of kings
And I will serve him until I die, and hopefully into eternity. I make mistakes and I lose sight, but my trust will remain in the Lord. I see his power way too much to deny him his just praise.
At the end of the service God blessed each one of us through the people of that church. They laid hand on us and prayed for us. It is something I really can’t put into words, but a peace came over me. The only way to describe it is the peace that passes understanding. It is a knowledge that you have been forgiven and you owe nothing for it. It spawns a love in my heart that I want everyone to know, but there is only one source and the source is God the Father.
Tuesday, May 02, 2006
Saturday, March 25, 2006
Beautiful Sorrow
Every year we have volunteers come down to help us with our workload through project Barnabus. These people are a huge blessing to us, and since I started working here there has been one that comes every year once in the spring and once in the summer. His name is Keith Bird. I would like to relay to you an experience God blessed him with while here.
Keith loves to work with brand new groups. He delights in being able to share the knowledge he has learned over the years, and most groups are delighted to have such help. This year the Sigma Phi lambda Sorority from Waco, Texas came to build a home and he was fortunate enough to be assigned to this group.
The group worked the first day on the foundation and a few walls. That night mother of the woman of the house passed away.
As Keith and his group returned the next day they learned of the occurrence, and were unsure of how to proceed. I had never had anything like this happen before either, so they decided to finish the construction of the walls away from the site and stand walls the following day.
Somewhere in the course of the day Keith thought that it might be nice to have a Spanish-speaking pastor visit with the family and allow the group to show their concern for the family. As it so happened there was just such a pastor in another group the he was assigned to.
The family had cleared a room in their small pallet shack and the brand new shiny coffin seemed so out of place in that small run down room. They left the coffin open and explained to the group that she so wanted to see the new house and so the coffin stayed open. The pastor came and related the condolences of the group to the family. He gave a small service and sang some songs and played his guitar.
As Keith told me this story he choked back the tears as he recounted how beautiful the service was. He told me that one gentleman in the family accepted Christ as his savior. I was also fighting back the tears just hearing the story.
The family was gone, busy with all the arraignments and burial, the rest of the time their new home was being constructed. It was so wonderful to see the extra care that went into this house. There was not big presentation to the family. The group left quietly leaving the keys with the neighbor. But in my heart I know the family can see how much the group cared for them. It showed in their work.
Keith told me it was the most beautiful thing he had seen in the five years he has been coming to serve. I am so blessed to know these people.
Thank you God.
Keith loves to work with brand new groups. He delights in being able to share the knowledge he has learned over the years, and most groups are delighted to have such help. This year the Sigma Phi lambda Sorority from Waco, Texas came to build a home and he was fortunate enough to be assigned to this group.
The group worked the first day on the foundation and a few walls. That night mother of the woman of the house passed away.
As Keith and his group returned the next day they learned of the occurrence, and were unsure of how to proceed. I had never had anything like this happen before either, so they decided to finish the construction of the walls away from the site and stand walls the following day.
Somewhere in the course of the day Keith thought that it might be nice to have a Spanish-speaking pastor visit with the family and allow the group to show their concern for the family. As it so happened there was just such a pastor in another group the he was assigned to.
The family had cleared a room in their small pallet shack and the brand new shiny coffin seemed so out of place in that small run down room. They left the coffin open and explained to the group that she so wanted to see the new house and so the coffin stayed open. The pastor came and related the condolences of the group to the family. He gave a small service and sang some songs and played his guitar.
As Keith told me this story he choked back the tears as he recounted how beautiful the service was. He told me that one gentleman in the family accepted Christ as his savior. I was also fighting back the tears just hearing the story.
The family was gone, busy with all the arraignments and burial, the rest of the time their new home was being constructed. It was so wonderful to see the extra care that went into this house. There was not big presentation to the family. The group left quietly leaving the keys with the neighbor. But in my heart I know the family can see how much the group cared for them. It showed in their work.
Keith told me it was the most beautiful thing he had seen in the five years he has been coming to serve. I am so blessed to know these people.
Thank you God.
Sunday, March 19, 2006
The Impact of One
So far this spring I have been privileged to see about 1000 group participants come to Juarez to build 44 houses in the course of two weeks. As I sit here and really think about what it means I am struck by the huge numbers of people that are affected by an act of love in Jesus name.
If you consider that most families we build for are 4 to 6 members in size. 220 Mexican family members in the last two weeks that have been directly touched by Gods love in Juarez alone. Those that serve are also affected, bringing the numbers to 1220, and that does not even scratch the surface of the potential numbers of people who could receive a blessing from this simple act of love and service. Family, friends, neighbors, of both participants and Mexican families could be indirectly affected. Who really knows what that number could be save God himself?
I want share with you a story of how one young man (Brent) has changed the lives of his entire family and had a huge impact on his church and the work they do on mission trips. Brent was finishing high school and preparing to go to college. He had been saving his money to buy a computer to help him with his studies while at college. His mom (Lori) told me that this computer was his life at that time. You just couldn’t get him to stop talking about it.
At the same time his mom was planning the churches first Mexico mission trip for the youth group. She told Brent that she thought she was going to have to cancel the trip because they did not have enough people signing up.
Brent said to his mom, “ You know if I sign up for the trip more people will go.”
Lori said, “ I know.”
“So, do you want me to sign up?” He asked
She replied, “ That is a decision you have to make for yourself.
The next morning Brent told his mom that he was going to sign up for the trip. They had a small group of fourteen people come to Juarez to build their first home. Lori told me that Brent complained most of the time he was here. He would tell her he was hot, tired and just wanted to go home because he had to get ready for school. But one night right before they finished I was asked to stop by their campfire. I did, and while I was there I answered many questions about Amor and the work we do. But, somewhere along the way I was asked how much the house cost to build, and when I answered unknown to me, Brent was amazed. He later told he mom that the amount I said was the amount he spent on his computer. To him all the important things before his trip were no longer important. He just saw a family receive a home and everything else melted away.
Brent died in a car accident on his way to college that summer.
His mom and his family are grateful that Brent came to Juarez and that God changed his heart before he took him home. The church has since more then double the numbers of people they bring on their Mexico mission trips. They may have never come to Juarez if he had not signed up for that trip. He may have never seen God I such close way if he had not decided to come.
If you consider that most families we build for are 4 to 6 members in size. 220 Mexican family members in the last two weeks that have been directly touched by Gods love in Juarez alone. Those that serve are also affected, bringing the numbers to 1220, and that does not even scratch the surface of the potential numbers of people who could receive a blessing from this simple act of love and service. Family, friends, neighbors, of both participants and Mexican families could be indirectly affected. Who really knows what that number could be save God himself?
I want share with you a story of how one young man (Brent) has changed the lives of his entire family and had a huge impact on his church and the work they do on mission trips. Brent was finishing high school and preparing to go to college. He had been saving his money to buy a computer to help him with his studies while at college. His mom (Lori) told me that this computer was his life at that time. You just couldn’t get him to stop talking about it.
At the same time his mom was planning the churches first Mexico mission trip for the youth group. She told Brent that she thought she was going to have to cancel the trip because they did not have enough people signing up.
Brent said to his mom, “ You know if I sign up for the trip more people will go.”
Lori said, “ I know.”
“So, do you want me to sign up?” He asked
She replied, “ That is a decision you have to make for yourself.
The next morning Brent told his mom that he was going to sign up for the trip. They had a small group of fourteen people come to Juarez to build their first home. Lori told me that Brent complained most of the time he was here. He would tell her he was hot, tired and just wanted to go home because he had to get ready for school. But one night right before they finished I was asked to stop by their campfire. I did, and while I was there I answered many questions about Amor and the work we do. But, somewhere along the way I was asked how much the house cost to build, and when I answered unknown to me, Brent was amazed. He later told he mom that the amount I said was the amount he spent on his computer. To him all the important things before his trip were no longer important. He just saw a family receive a home and everything else melted away.
Brent died in a car accident on his way to college that summer.
His mom and his family are grateful that Brent came to Juarez and that God changed his heart before he took him home. The church has since more then double the numbers of people they bring on their Mexico mission trips. They may have never come to Juarez if he had not signed up for that trip. He may have never seen God I such close way if he had not decided to come.
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