Overprotective Frustrations

In November I went to Puerto Peñasco a.k.a. Rocky Point. Since then I have been turning over and over in my head just how I wanted to share the experience with you. There were so many things that happened and some that were hard to handle that I am still not sure if I can truly relate how I feel about it.

Since I started working with Amor Ministries, I have found that more and more I am increasingly becoming attached to the groups I work with. You see, God has placed a burden on my heart to care for my groups. Not only to care for them but to take care of them, to provide all that I can to help them make their trip successful. Admittedly there are times that I fail to live up to that calling, and other times things arise that are just out of my control. Puerto Peñasco provided plenty of circumstances that I had no control over. It left me feeling helpless.

I remember when my daughter was born the doctor used some sort of suction cup on her head to assist in removing her from her mother. I watched in horror as it deformed her head to the shape of the cup. I really wanted to hit the doctor for doing that to my baby, but I knew he had done this many times before and logic told me it was going to be alright. Even so, I could not help the overprotective feeling that was raging inside, yet my not being a doctor left me in a position to do nothing. Puerto Peñasco brought that same feeling about my groups because there was nothing I could do but pray.

One of the joys I bring away from going to Puerto Peñasco is the fact that I get to work with Central Christian Church my home church in Mesa, AZ. This year I also worked with St. Simon and Jude and American Evangelical Lutheran. I enjoy the fellowship with each of these groups and hope to see them return.

Unfortunately each of these groups had and accident on their trip. St. Simon and Jude’s accident turned out to be a minor cut from a board falling on the head of one of their students and they were able to return to the project. But Central and American Lutheran’s were major accidents.

Central had a man fall from the roof resulting in serious head and back injuries. Last I heard he was still in the hospital starting rehabilitation. American Lutheran had a major traffic accident with a dump truck on their way out of camp as they headed for home. It appeared that no one had major injuries but one man was taken to the United States to be checked for a concussion. I still have heard nothing further about him.

Needless to say it was a long hard trip, when I turned to God, I felt like I was watching that doctor again wondering what the heck he was doing, but knowing he knows best. I painfully praised God because I know he works all thing together for the good of those who love Him. I certainly love Him, and I am sure these groups love Him also. So, my only conclusion is that it has to work for good somewhere down the road.

When I finally returned home I let myself grieve over the pain my groups felt and the pain of helplessness that I felt. I sat in my truck listening to the words of this song and finally broke down and wept;

No Doubt by Petra
There are times when you feel like you can't go on
There are times when you feel like giving in
And there are times when you feel like you can't try anymore
There are times of trouble in believing
This test of your faith will last
As long as it takes to pass
Till you have no more doubt you'll endure
And your faith will emerge true and pure

There's a time to take a reckless leap of faith
There's a time to be cautious and to wait
And there's a way of learning from the past
That this time of trouble won't last
And sometimes we want to think we know
The ways He will choose to make us grow
But it's never the way of our choosing
And we can't always see what He's using

There will be winters in the seasons of our soul
With a cold and bitter wind that chills our lives
But our faith can be building a fire
That will warm us till springtime arrives

No doubt it'll be alright
With God it'll work together for good
No doubt in the end it will be understood
No doubt it'll all work out
With faith He can move any mountain for us
No doubt in the power of Jesus
And after all is done we find out
All we really need to have is no doubt

The Forgotten Heart

I knew I was going to miss something. And now I am going to sound like a horrible son-in-law. I had my mind so set on ministry related items that I completely forgot that I have not in formed you of my mother-in-laws surgery.

Before we came to El Paso about 5 or 6 years ago she had a heart attack. The doctors put some stints in. This past August she was supposed to go in and have a few more stints put in but while at the hospitals the doctors discovered that the damage was far worse than originally thought. They kept her there to do a bypass procedure. It ended up being five arteries that they were able to bypass. The surgery went well and the healing has been going well also. It was however, a very stressful time for all of us, but it seems that everyone is pulling through fine. She has been going to cardio rehab (which is about an hour of exercise three times a week), and she is doing very well.

There has been some benefit for me as well, the change in diet and the walking I do while waiting for her to finish the rehab is causing me to lose some weight, so far about 9 pounds.

overdue update

All my life I have always been the type of person that thinks about what I am going to say before I say it. I suppose that is a good habit. It certainly has kept me from putting my foot in my mouth form time to time (of course there are still times that my mental filters don’t work). But, I find that it can also hinder my ability to hold good conversations. There have been countless conversations that have passed me by because I was reviewing my response to a certain topic only to find that the conversation had moved on to something entirely different. Writing to you has been a wonderfully different experience. I am completely in control of the conversation and can take all the time I feel necessary to find the right words to communicate my thoughts. Until now that has suited me quite well. Since the end of summer I have been processing my thoughts in order to fill you in on all that has transpired since my last correspondence, only to have something else come along which changed the whole thought process of what I wanted to be the topic of this letter. Needless to say there are many things that I need to share and I scarcely know where to begin. So, I have finally decided that I had better just sit down a write. (at least I can edit it later if I don’t like how it comes out)

As you read in my last letter Juarez and El Paso got hit with more then a fair amount of rain which caused flooding in both cities. I don’t have the numbers for Juarez but 325 families are being forced to rebuild their homes or relocate in El Paso alone (that does not include businesses). Given the conditions I see every day in Juarez, I have to believe the numbers are higher there. We at Amor have been collecting household items and clothing in an effort to help families rebuild. We are also starting a special push for next year hoping to bring extra groups to help rebuild Juarez.

You may remember that we have been without a field manager in El Paso/Juarez for quite some time now. That position has been offered to me and I have accepted it. I was unsure if the position was right for me, but so many people asked me why I didn’t take it, that I began to wonder if it may be God prompting me to take the position. So I told Amor that I was interested in the position but only if everyone agreed I was the right person for the job. Well I suppose they felt I was right because here I am. I am still a bit nervous about it though. Over the passed year God has really impressed upon me that I am exactly where he wants me, and I could see the gifts he gave to me working so well in my former position. Taking on this new position has caused me to question if my gifts fit it well or not. I know that God is constantly refining me and He certainly has the ability to give new gifts to fit my situation. But, it has been my experience that he makes me grow through trials, and while I am willing to face the trails that are in store, I have to admit the uncertainty of what might come my way scares me. I don’t want to fail him. And looking back at my history, I would have to believe that I will fail at some point. My hope is that I don’t let one failure defeat me.

This may sound a bit redundant but with my acceptance of the field manager position, my former field specialist position is now open. I am sure that God will provide the correct person for the position. But, it can’t hurt to have your petitions for just such an outcome as well.

This month we were informed that the gentleman who we rent our campground from is trying to sell and has apparently found a buyer. That would mean that we would need to find new property to use as a campground. We still have not received any written notification of the pending sell. So we are not sure what it all means just yet, but if you would please keep this issue in prayer it would be very much appreciated. It has our staff here a little worried (none more then our camp caretaker who lives at camp). I know God will work it all out for the good but I am not looking forward to moving.

We recently started a bible study that has been such a blessing to us here in El Paso/Juarez. It is something that was supposed happen every fall but it was never something we did together. Over the past month or two the Mexican staff and I have been meeting to study scripture, and share our struggles, concerns, needs and observations. God has been working in a mighty way to bind us together not just as coworkers but as brothers. I pray that we use what we are learning to become better servants to God, the groups we work with, the families we build for, our pastor’s board and all people.

Well those are the major items that I wanted to share, I am sure I’ve left something out. Just know that with all that has been going on I have not stopped thinking about you. Your support, whether financial or spiritual, sustains me. It would be extremely difficult to continue without you.

Soggy Desert

It may have been a slow summer for us with regards to the number of groups we have come to build homes. But the last month has been anything but uneventful. Rain has been causing trouble all month with the worst of it coming in the last week or so.

At the beginning of the month there was a rainstorm that over flowed the dam of one of the water reservoirs in Juarez causing flooding that killed six people. For the last week and a half there has been so much water dumped on El Paso and Juarez that reservoirs are overflowing all over the place. Another person was found dead in the rushing waters, and a least two more died in flood related traffic accidents.

There were a few days that we were worried one of the dams would break altogether sending some 600 million gallons of water through two miles of housing before it would reach the Rio Grande. Crews worked for three days straight to empty that reservoir, and they succeeded. (To the relief of both residents in Juarez and El Paso because there was a fear that it would rush over the levies of the river and pour into down town El Paso.) At one point during all the rain the river came very close to topping the levies and pouring out into both cities

This being the desert, the two cities are not prepared to handle the kind of water that we have been seeing, and rightly so. The 30-year average rainfall is slightly over nine inches and some places around the city have seen up to five inches in less then a day. The damage has been substantial to say the least. I am surprised more lives have not been lost.

Although the rain is letting up some, we are not completely out of danger yet. The ground is completely saturated, leaving nowhere for water to go should we get more rain. Unfortunately there is more rain in the forecast.


Below are some picture I took of the damage.

this is the reservoir that we were worried about